Understood to be the real story behind John Grisham's, A Tine to Kill



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Welcome to my world where it is certain that enlightenment will take you from the realm of surviving to the wonder of thriving in a world where joy and love can be your daily experience. I do not believe that the human soul can revive completely after suffering from the kind of trauma that childhood abuse inflicts without some kind of deep spirituality and meditation. I absolutely know that no particular religious group holds the key to your healing. How can I say that with certainty? Because I know that the key to your healing lies within your own spiritual being. The path that best suits your recovery will be the path that introduces you to yourself.

If childhood abuse has deprived you of the direction in your life that comes from the innate joy of living and you are looking for the door to your full recovery, then you are in a good place here with us. You are not alone! Did you know that one out of three girls and one out of  five boys on the planet have suffered from sexual assault and abuse. The social implications of those numbers is staggering! If we consider that abuse is a cycle and abusers generally come from abusive situations then we understand why this problem has become an epidemic. It is time to break the cycle. If you are still interested in being a victim, then you don't want to read my book because it will just trigger your internal pain, but if you are looking to move from surviving to thriving then you may find some strength in reading about my personal healing journey. Then, you need to begin sharing your own story.

 “A word written has been felt and a word spoken has been conquered.”
Tara Katchetorian (Kadijah) A blessed soul and friend who passed from this world Dec. 2006

I invite you to explore the pages of this website. You’ll find information about me, my Natural Perfume Business and workshops, my work with young adults, and my debut novel, The Still Before Dawn.

You can read an excerpt from the book, engage in book-related activities and discussions, and find out how to invite me to speak to your group or book club. To learn more about The Still Before Dawn, visit my Blog, where I share reflections and insight.  You can also join our Facebook and Twitter accounts.

If you feel like sharing some of your world with me, please connect on this special forum.

I hope this to become an environment where others experiencing a similar upbringing can come, feel safe, and begin to heal.

Lots of Love

Suzanne McConnell

The Still Before Dawn Video

SufiFilms.com just completed this promotional video for us.


A Video Message From the Author  "One Survivor Among Many"


Book Description

Believed to be the story that inspired John Grisham's "A Time to Kill"; This fictionalized autobiography is centered around a true life rape victim's story heard in a Mississippi court room. However, unlike the novel where the girl is wrapped in the loving arms of her family and her honor is defended by her father, the real little girl was handed back to the very perpetrators of the crime committed against her. While the novel, published in 1987 is believed to have exploited her story for it's sensational appeal and went on to become a movie, millions of fans were entertained and dollars made. Meanwhile a child struggled to grow up in an environment of horrendous abuse, isolation and psychological manipulation. This is her story as she remembers it. Written as a fictionalized narrative changing names and some circumstances in order to protect the innocent, this book explores the psychological mechanisms of disassociation and memory repression and delves deeply into the family dynamics when incest, abuse and betrayal replace the love and security that childhood is supposed to offer. This is also the story of a young woman's journey from the devastating effects of a life lived in the shadows of her own partially repressed memories into the light of reality where she learned to accept herself and love the world around her. Survival is what we all did when we made it through the abuse. Living is what we do when we realize that the abuse was never about us and we are not to blame.

Book Reviews & Testimonials

"I found this book to be an answer for many things in my life! Horribly disturbing how much evil I was born into! Thank you for your truth!" 

As Appearing on Amazon.com

The rules of each farm were the same. You are not a fraud. My pillow is wet from tears.

A  Fellow Survivor. 

"A disturbing look at the inside of a cult from a molested child's perspective."'

Vickie Brackage, B.S. Early Childhood Development, OSU.

"Thanks girl!"


Join Us on Twitter

The best way to stay up to date on events and the latest information about Suzanne is to link your twitter account to @stillbeforedawn

Hope to see you there!



Help Others Heal

The Still Before Dawn is an inspirational story certain to help others with their similar struggles. We encourage everyone who believes in this book and what it has to offer to help promote it by including one of the following icons on your website, Facebook account, blog, etc. You can also sign up to be an affiliate at Amazon.com and earn money while promoting the book.

Link the above promo icons to your Amazon affiliate account or to the http://www.thestillbeforedawn.com homepage.

Thank you so very much!

Select Sites on Incest, Child Abuse  & Cults

  • Bearing Through It   When people are abused and assaulted, it is like the doors to their souls slam shut. The goal of Joyful Heart is to let the light, and the life, back in--to banish the darkness and let the healing begin. -- Mariska Hargitay, President & Founder, Joyful Heart Foundation
  • Joyful Heart Foundation  This is a quite extensive site for those who are healing from rape and abuse. It has been created by a fellow journeying survivor. May you find wisdom in her journey.
  • Faces of Rape and Sexual Abuse Survivors  "Faces of Rape and Sexual Abuse Survivors", reveals the inner strength of women and men who have been put to the ultimate trial of their lives.
  • Survivors of Incest Anonymous  Resource for helping those abused by incest.
  • Child Abuse  Discussion and presentations of statistics on child abuse, especially child sexual abuse.
  • Mothers Against Sexual Abuse  Established to educate society about the reality and the debilitating effects of child sexual abuse, design and support legislation that will protect children, provide a national resource referral network to help victims and families experiencing this tragedy.
  • Cults:  From positive to homicidal faith groups.
  • Child Abuse in religious cults and sects  About religious Cults and Sects regarding brainwashing, thought control and mind control techniques. Jonestown, and Waco. Cult recruitment of youth and college students. An archive and referral service.


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